fall asleep in the sun & dream of the beautiful

I met up with Aidil`s twin brother, Fitri, just now because he needed to talk to me about certain things. I`m glad he`s able to talk to me & confide comfortably though we`ve only met for 3 times. As I`m typing this away, he`s somewhere out there fighting for what he strongly believes in - LOVE. & it is with all my heart that I pray & hope that he attains that one person he has lost.

As I`m typing this away, Aidil is ALSO somewhere out there, but he isn`t doing any fighting. In fact, he`s losing something. That one phone call I made to him justified everything. I am done with our mess. I am done with heartaches & disappointment. & when he`s finally ready, I might not even be around anymore. I can only hold out for so long. True enough, I am his need & she is his want. But he`s too blind to see. & I cannot go on because this kills me.


Fitri: Fit, if you leave my brother, please don`t leave Zaki & me...
Me: No, I`m not gonna leave you guys. I`ll still be around.

See, maybe it`s not so bad. I lost one person, but I gained two more. & that`s all that matters now.

You. cannot. be. my. Strength. anymore.
MY Strength does not hurt me like this.